Our kids…
Our plan never included foster care. I always thought it was too messy, too hard, that I’d get too attached. Then we saw their faces…we learned their names, we heard their stories, and everything changed. They didn’t choose to be here [in foster care]. They didn’t choose to be taken from all they’ve ever known, thrown into a house full of strangers, a house that feels nothing like home to them. We couldn’t say no. We realized that these kids are our kids, they are our responsibility, all of ours.
I want to share the good and hard parts of our journey, and hopefully in doing that I can help debunk the myths and misunderstandings most people hold about foster care.
They may go through life seen by the world as a label – a foster kid – a nameless, faceless statistic with a sad story. Their stories are ones that make people pause when they see it on the news, but stories that everyone thinks someone else will take care of.
These kids are ours. They are wanted. They are cherished. They are loved. They may only stay one week, or they may stay forever; no matter how long it is, they will know love. Most of my days look pretty ordinary. They are filled with naps, bottles, yoga pants, spit up and diapers; but through all of it I am learning to love deeper. I am learning to love with no guarantee of tomorrow.
Most of my days look pretty ordinary. They are filled with naps, bottles, yoga pants, spit up and diapers; but through all of it I am learning to love deeper. I am learning to love with no guarantee of tomorrow.
I don’t want to spend my life holding my heart intact - I want to spread it all over, let it break into a million pieces, and send a part of it with every child and family we encounter. These kids, these families, they deserve that.
Our hope…
Our hope is that the joy of loving and providing a safe and stable home for children outweighs the gripping fear of losing them.
Our hope is that thousands of loving families will step into this work: the work of healing and reconciliation among those most ignored by our society.
Our hope is that foster care will work – that generational cycles of abuse, addiction and poverty will be broken, and that through healing, families will be able to stay in tact.
Our hope is that people can see these children for what they are. They may have the label of “foster kid,” a label that comes with a lot of baggage and misunderstandings. But these are precious children: they are strong, they have just had an unfair lot handed to them. They are not invisible. They are ours.
I don’t want to spend my life holding my heart intact - I want to spread it all over, let it break into a million pieces, and send a part of it with every child and family we encounter. These kids, these families, they deserve that.
Our story…
I may not be able to share their names or faces, and their story is theirs alone to tell, but I am working to find a way to share our story as foster parents. Storytelling changes hearts, and it ultimately changes the world.
I believe that in sharing our story we can help to humanize foster care. There are nearly 30,000 kids in foster care in Los Angeles alone, and I believe the world needs to see that those are real children, not just numbers on a page. I want to share the good and hard parts of our journey, and hopefully in doing that I can help debunk the myths and misunderstandings most people hold about foster care. The journey may not be glamorous, it is definitely filled with a whole lot of ordinary and hard days, but this is right where we are supposed to be, and I want to share that. You can follow our family’s journey on Instagram (@designatedstrangers).
Here are three ways @designatedstrangers uses instagram to educate:
1. She invites followers to share their journey by asking questions in her caption and broadening conversation.
2. She keeps it simple and informative by addressing the questions she has received most as a foster mom and providing resources to followers.
3. She gracefully shares her journey through stories, pictures, and her own learning experiences.
All photos from this post are @designatedstrangers