In part one of “Rediscovering Authenticity: Be Kind to Yourself,” we addressed the ways in which we usually handle our faults and weaknesses: most of the time, we either ignore them or we use them to fuel the fire of shame on ourselves. We proposed a third option…one where we are able to look honestly at our flaws and mistakes and give ourselves the perfect amount of grace to propel us forward–to experience freedom.
Here are some ways to begin doing this today:
Pay attention.
Start by just listening to those voices inside of your mind. What are they saying? What tone are they using? Are your words destructive or encouraging? If you spoke to a friend with those same words, would it be loving? Cold? Judgmental? Simply being aware of the ways you have learned to speak to yourself and the habits you have formed is a crucial first step.
Be brave.
Being honest with ourselves is scary. Making changes in the way we think and live is intimidating. Honesty requires vulnerability and risk. But that’s okay! Fear is an indicator, but it’s not a bad thing. We do not have to let fear control us and keep us from living authentic lives. Be brave and keep moving forward.
Write it out.
Some days are going to be easier than others. It’s so easy to fall back into old habits and forget why this was so important in the first place. Writing things down will not only help you process as you go, but will help encourage you on those days when you’re feeling less than motivated to let yourself be human.
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Write down the weaknesses and faults that you have been too afraid to face and let yourself admit that they are there.
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Write down the specific lies you tell yourself about who you are and why you may or may not have value.
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Then write down why these lies are not true.
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List the repercussions that you have experienced as a result of withholding grace from yourself. Write out the ways that guilt and shame have impacted your happiness, your relationships, your career, etc.
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Write down the good things about yourself that you like!
Then when you forget, go back. Remind yourself. And keep walking toward freedom.
Being honest with ourselves is scary. Making changes in the way we think and live is intimidating. Honesty requires vulnerability and risk…We do not have to let fear control us and keep us from living authentic lives. Be brave and keep moving forward.
Don’t do it alone.
Start honest conversations with people about what it means to balance honesty and grace. You must know you are not the only one. There are people around you that are scared of honesty too. They are often unkind to themselves the same way you are. And they long to change that for themselves. Invite them to join you in the struggle. You are not alone.
Now go, be honest, give yourself grace, and be the magnificent human that you are. Remember to be kind, and trust your process as you become, each day, more into who you were created to be.
Photo by Whitney Darling Photography